Monday, March 18, 2013

Thirty Days of Truth: Day 3

Day 03. Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Well, the biggest thing is not something I am prepared to share here. I am a pretty open book, but some chapters are too private and painful to read aloud. That's okay though, I think I can still come up with a pretty long list of things. Of course, the prompt only asked for one....

I think that if I have to distill it all down to one thing would have to be not doing enough for the people I love when I had the chance. Not taking the time to go that extra mile to meet their needs. Not saying "I love you" enough. In general not being super human and all things to all the people in my life. This is something my rational mind knows is impossible. But my heart....well, it keeps trying. And when it fails we fall hard.

It's true. I do fail. I can't be all things to all people. I can't meet everyone's needs. And that's okay (right??). See, my mind knows it really is okay. But my heart still questions, still wants to find fault. Still wants to take the blame. As if I were the one truly in control of this crazy life. I do fail, but my God doesn't ever fail. And He is the one in control. And since I know that He doesn't want me to live in the shadow of my past, I really have to work on forgiving myself and moving forward in His grace. So, I'm's the best I can do.

Okay! That's 3 questions down! I am making progress! Right?!?!? Tune in sometime soon for Question #4 which is "Something you have to forgive someone else for". Well, this should be FUN!!

Hey, do me a favor if you have made it this far, say a prayer for my sweet hubby. He has been having some bad days lately and is really struggling. We go to the doctor later this week and I am asking God to please guide us and the doctor to find what is wrong. Your prayers are greatly appreciated. 


  1. I love this entry - I'm not ready to admit my biggest failures either ... but someday I will because I know it can be used for good.

  2. Great entry! I know my biggest failure is forgiveness. I have such a hard time with it, and it is such a failing of mine. I do a good job most times, but there are still a few painful times when my husband was dying that certain people really hurt me and I can't forgive them (yet). I hope to some day, but for now I use "avoidance".

  3. Absolutely lifting your family up in prayer. And just so you know, I refer to the "f" word as another curse word...and no, I don't mean the "f" word that is a curse word! ;)


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