I have the luxury of being able to listen to audiobooks or music while I work (on headphones) and I was in such a great mood, I chose praise and worship music. And it felt like every song I listened to had something in it just for me. Have you ever felt that? It is such an incredible feeling. I kept rewinding the songs to listen again, thinking how awesome each one was and how reflected just how I was feeling. I was so upbeat as I took a few minutes to send out prayer requests to our prayer group, I even found the perfect scripture to capture the moment:
"You have rescued me! I will celebrate and shout, singing praises to you with all my heart." Psalm 71:23
Perfect, right?!?! And I just kept thinking what a great day this was shaping up to be. All of this happened within the first 3 hours of my workday. After that, it all went downhill. Too much work, not enough people to shoulder the load, and too many things going on led to a very stressful and frustrating conclusion. I was so down by the time 3:30 came (well 3:45 really 'cause I was running late) I couldn't wait to escape.In the back of my mind I kept thinking, what the hell happened???? (sorry if the language offends, yes this christian cusses)
Finally it dawned on me, life happened. I have heard it said so often, God doesn't promise sunshine and rainbows, he promises to walk through the rain with you. Somehow, I always associate that thought with the really bad times. You know, illness, financial problems, big bad things that we all like to pretend only happen other people. I picture thunderstorms with lightening flashing all around, hurricanes or tornadoes with strong winds that push and pull at my soul. But sometimes all it takes is a brief downpour to throw us off track. And God is always there. He didn't leave me, I left him. I let the confusion and stress of the moment block my view of his face. But he always had his eyes on me. He was waiting, just waiting for me to reconnect with him; to see that he had his arms outstretched, ready to comfort and sooth my soul. Ready to put me back on the path and restore my gladness.
Do you see? Do you see him waiting? I do.
One of the songs I love! Always speaks to my heart :)
You write very well. I am so glad I am going to be able to read your blogs. Not only that, but you have great insight. You should have started this a long time ago but it had to be in God's time thus the reason you are blogging now. Keep up the great work!~
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