Captured

How great You are, how small I am

How awesome is Your mighty hand

And I am captured by the wonder of it all.

That is the chorus to the song "How Great You Are" by Phillips, Craig, and Dean.
I can't seem to get it out of my head, or maybe my heart. Am I truly captured? So many things compete for my attention everyday. Life is so full of ups and downs, joys and sorrows, frustrations and stress. And it seems that the frustration and stress are the things that really capture my focus and attention. Why do I let that happen? Because despite what I tell myself, it is a choice I make everyday. I choose to be caught up in either God's joy and purpose or I choose to be caught up in the world and it's frustration, stress, and negativity.

The world requires so much from us, it seems to drive us to perfection, and when we don't reach it, we are left feeling empty and hurt. God requires only one thing from us, love. Because if we love him, truly love him; the rest will follow. We will be captured by all the wonder around us. I want to walk in that wonder. I want to be captured today by God's grace and love, not by the stresses of my daily life.

Lord, 

Walk with me today. I have great intentions, but I am weak. I know that it will only take a second to distract me from the path you have put before me. When this happens, recapture my attention and draw my focus back to you. I love you Father, and I am grateful beyond words for your forgiveness and acceptance of me, just as I am. I am so small and you are so great, and yet you do know my name. You know so much more of me than I even know myself, and you still love me. Thank you for that miracle of love.

 Amen

one of THOSE days

Yesterday was definitely one of those days. You know, the kind where you wake up with a light heart and you feel like you could take on the world because you KNOW that God has your back. I felt so close to him.

 I have the luxury of being able to listen to audiobooks or music while I work (on headphones) and I was in such a great mood, I chose praise and worship music. And it felt like every song I listened to had something in it just for me. Have you ever felt that? It is such an incredible feeling. I kept rewinding the songs to listen again, thinking how awesome each one was and how reflected just how I was feeling. I was so upbeat as I took a few minutes to send out prayer requests to our prayer group, I even found the perfect scripture to capture the moment:

  "You have rescued me! I will celebrate and shout, singing praises to you with all my heart." Psalm 71:23 

Perfect, right?!?! And I just kept thinking what a great day this was shaping up to be. All of this happened within the first 3 hours of my workday. After that, it all went downhill. Too much work, not enough people to shoulder the load, and too many things going on led to a very stressful and frustrating conclusion. I was so down by the time 3:30 came (well 3:45 really 'cause I was running late) I couldn't wait to escape.In the back of my mind I kept thinking, what the hell happened???? (sorry if the language offends, yes this christian cusses)

Finally it dawned on me, life happened. I have heard it said so often, God doesn't promise sunshine and rainbows, he promises to walk through the rain with you. Somehow, I always associate that thought with the really bad times. You know, illness, financial problems, big bad things that we all like to pretend only happen other people. I picture thunderstorms with lightening flashing all around, hurricanes or tornadoes with strong winds that push and pull at my soul. But sometimes all it takes is a brief downpour to throw us off track. And God is always there. He didn't leave me, I left him. I let the confusion and stress of the moment block my view of his face. But he always had his eyes on me. He was waiting, just waiting for me to reconnect with him; to see that he had his arms outstretched, ready to comfort and sooth my soul. Ready to put me back on the path and restore my gladness.

  Do you see? Do you see him waiting? I do. 

One of the songs I love! Always speaks to my heart :)

 

Blessed

So I am at work this morning and I got some news that I can't share but it really affected my out look on my world. And you know what I realize? I am so blessed. I have had the same job for 16 years. It isn't fancy or life changing. It doesn't pay the big bucks, in fact I live pretty much paycheck to paycheck. But as I look around I can't help but feel so overwhelmed by the friendships and respect I have found here. I have always known that God led me here, I just never really understood why. Lately I have come to think that maybe he led me here simply to be. To be in a place where I can connect with other people and share my faith. A place where I can look around and see this person or that person and think how incredible they are and how much I wish God's blessings on them. Maybe I am here to learn to see these people and my own life through God's eyes. We all tend to think that if we are not out changing the world that we are somehow a failure, if we don't have the fancy degree or make loads of cash that we are beneath notice. We are NEVER beneath the notice of the one who created us. And we can and do change the world, just by being in it. By living where God has placed us and loving the people he has placed there beside us. And recognizing every now and then the wonder of it all. Wow, I really am so blessed!