This morning I actually sat down with my journal to write. It's been 10 days since I even tried to write anything there. I am a terrible journal-er. I let too many other things distract me. The thing is, journaling grounds me, it give me a sense of stability. It helps me to focus my thoughts on God and the day ahead. My friend Jerimi over at My Antidepressant Life recently wrote about this very thing. Of course what grounds her is different because people are different. But the principle is the same, taking quiet time to focus and center yourself on God and your surroundings. To give yourself a moment to see and remember what is truly important and of value in your life.
I sat down to write and of course, I start to berate myself to myself, talking about how I am my own worst enemy when it comes to writing (or exercising, or reading, or eating healthy, or...well you get the point). And it is true, I am my own worst enemy. I think most of us are. We hurt ourselves far more than anyone else can do because we can work from the inside. So, I sat here thinking harmful (if truthful) thoughts about all the many and varied ways I have failed of late. This blog, my diet, my work, my marriage, my relationships with family, my church...the list is endless. Hmm, seems like this journaling thing might not be such a good idea after all. But then God reminded me of something. Failure is not a person. I am not a failure. I have failed, but I am not a failure.
Romans 3:23 says "for all have sinned (failed) and fall short of the glory of God". I am not alone. And we are not failures. We are human, that's all. Frail, fragile human beings who fall short sometimes. It's okay.
And so I pick myself (and my journal) up, dust myself off and begin again. Justified freely by His grace (verse 24), forgiven, given a second (or 1000th) chance to try again. Here's to another day, full of ups and downs, success and failure, forgiveness and grace. I'll take it. :)